Simply A Farmer’s Wife

March 29, 2009, 11:38 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized
It’s been a while since I last updated but things have been extremely busy at my house.  We are working on several home projects which means no free time for me or my hubby!  Right now we are refinishing the hardwood floors in our guest bedroom.  Everything from our guest bedroom is now located in our office so there’s no getting in there for a while.  Our laundry/sun room is a disaster too.  We are painting in there this weekend and so we are in the process of moving everything out of there as well.  Where we are putting it I have no idea really.  I have added quite a bit of projects to our “to do” list and it’s pretty overwhelming.   I truly thought when I picked my paint colors 3 years ago I would be content for a long time but I should have known better.  I love changing the look of my house but I try to pick paint colors that I can do that with without having to change the actual color.  I’m excited about the new looks of my home and once we are done I’ll share some pictures.  There are so many people in blog land who have inspired me to love my home again.  I found The Lettered Cottage via Nester awhile back and her kitchen re do has completely inspired me to add some flare to my own kitchen.  Layla is a very talented interior designer and offers virtual design consultations for cheap.  I love her style and this girl really knows what she’s talking about when it comes to design.  If you get a chance check her out!
The Lettered Cottage

The Lettered Cottage

I love the wooden corbels  she added to her cabinets.  As soon as I can make my way to Home Depot I’m going to purchase some for my own cabinets.  I love her  beadboard wainscotting.  Say that 3 times!  We currently have a backsplash on one of our kitchen walls but wanted something differnet and thanks to Layla we (a.k.a. “me”) now know what that is.     Beadboard wainscotting
The Lettered Cottage

The Lettered Cottage

If you’d like to check out more of her fabulous kitchen just head on over to The Lettered Cottage!  We are going to put a new floor in our kitchen too and I have debated for a long time about what that particular floor would be.  I originally wanted a handscrapped hickory laminate wood flooring because it would wear well with our two dogs at the time now three dogs.  We currently have a cheap and by cheap I mean a total cost of $52.00 black and white check laminate floor.  We have gotten so many compliments on our floor (not sure why) but when we tell people we are going to remove it they frown.  I was at Lowe’s the other day and found the 12×12 black and white tiles that I think I’m going to go with.  Our kitchen is white cabinets and black countertops (which we are upgrading to Silestone) so I think keeping the floor would be a good idea.  Although that will be my next design question for Layla because I want an experts opinion.  Dirt is a common factor in our home with my husband being a farmer and 3 dogs so I need something that hides dirt.  The check floor isn’t doing it for me.  I found this floor via Nester’s blog and I absolutely love it but not sure if I want to invest that much time into a kitchen floor in a house we don’t plan on spending the rest of our lives in. 


I am super excited about the new living room furniture that my dear sweet hubby agreed to let me buy this weekend.  I don’t have any pictures yet but it’s gorgeous!  We need new furniture because when we purchased our current set about two years ago I didn’t keep in mind the fact that we have dogs and my husband is a farmer which translates into he plays in dirt.  Our furniture now is gorgeous and comfy and I hate to see it leave my house but it’s hard to keep clean so we bought some more durable and darker in color.  Once we get it I’ll take pictures.  I know how room for a coffee table which really make me happy.  I think I’m going to get a fabric tufted ottoman.  I saw a gorgeous one at TJ Maxx last week but I know without a doubt that it’s not there anymore. 

We finished the hardwoods in our guest room today and they look great.  I can’t put the furniture back in there until Wednesday because the floors have to sit for 3 days.  I have some new furniture for that room too and I cannot wait to see the new look of that room.  My mom and sister are coming in May for Parker’s birthday so that room is priority.

I am completely obsessed with my home now and I’m not sure if that’s healthy or not but I’m loving every 998 square feet of it.   I have painted so much in the last 5 months that I’ll be a happy girl when I can go 6 months without seeing a paint chip, paint brush or smell paint. 

If we aren’t at our house working we often find ourselves at Parker’s House working so we are looking forward to a much needed break in April when we’ll head down to Charleston for some great food, shopping and just relaxation.  I’m going to book us a couple’s massage because we both need and deserve one! 

Well, it’s late and we have a BIG day tomorrow so I better get some rest.  Please keep us in your prayers tonight and tomorrow we’ll share with you why.

March 17, 2009, 7:59 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Today is a special day.  Today Avery turns 3 in Heaven.  It’s hard to believe that she’s 3 today.  She is so missed and so loved by so many people who know her story.  Her mom, Lauren, is one of my best friends and one of the greatest people I know.  Please keep Avery’s family in your thoughts and prayers today. 

Happy Birthday, Avery Mae!

Today, Marion and Jason, will bury their daughter Virginia Addison Accord.  She lost her battle to CDH after a 22 day fight.  What a courageous and inspirational little girl.  Please remember this family in your thoughts and prayers today as well. 

Prayers Needed.
March 11, 2009, 10:42 am
Filed under: Prayer

One of my dear friends and one of the first people I shared Parker’s story with outside of Breath of Hope was my SHARE leader, Lori Farmer.  She helped me through many dark periods of my life and is one of those people who’s smile is contagious.  She makes you a better person for knowing her.  Last week she was diagnosed with breast cancer and on March 27th she will undergo surgery to have a mastectomy.  Please keep her family in your prayers.

March 10, 2009, 5:24 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized


I found Kelly over at Purple Lemon Designs through who else but the Nester and I have to say that I am completely in love with PLD!  She is working on some great and fun projects for me and I cannot wait to get my hands on them!  This gal is extremely talented and her Etsy shop doesn’t do her work justice.  Trust me I’ve seen first hand what this girl can do and it’s quite amazing.   As I’m sitting here typing this I’m thinking of other projects that I could put Kelly in charge of because I likelove her work that much.  I love to buy from SAHM’s or small businesses especially in the country’s economic crisis.  Please take a minute and check Kelly and Purple Lemon Designs out when you get a chance.  I promise you won’t be wasting your time and you’ll probably even secretly thank me later.  Sneak peek of my notecards she designed for me…..


In A Month…
March 8, 2009, 1:40 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

We’ll embrace the 3rd anniversary of Parker’s diagnosis with congenital diaphragmatic hernia with many mixed emotions. Tonight I was cleaning out our file cabinet and I came across ultrasound pictures from the day we were diagnosed. Talk about getting choked up. Kicked in the gut. Cat got your tongue. Whatever you want to call it was hard to see those pictures because it was truly the day our lives changed forever.

Then I found the diagram the doctor drew for us. Yeah, I still have that too. I kept everything that had anything to do with her. I’ll never be able to part with anything that was about Parker. For those who’ve walked a mile in my shoes you know what I’m talking about and for those who haven’t I think even you can relate to some extent.

In two months Parker will be 3 years old. Our lives have been one hell of a roller coaster. I’m talking Disney World worthy roller coaster. I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would bury my baby girl. That I would watch her fight helplessly for her own life while I sat back and could do absolutely nothing. I never dreamed God would take her from me. Am I still bitter and angry? Probably. A part of me found peace and a huge part of me heals every single day we help another family find their way through their own CDH journey.

Grief is a crazy thing. It’ll knock you on your feet when you least expect it. I miss her. A lot. I dream about her a lot too. Not just at night but during the day. I’ll imagine what she looks like now and if she has my disposition or her daddy’s. I pray his. I wonder if her eyes are still blue. Her hair still curly. I tried to memorize every single part of her body when they told us she would die. Some days I remember them vividly and some days they are just a hazy memory.

People ask us all the time how we can still praise God and it’s simple. God didn’t have to give Parker to us but He did because He saw something in us that was beyond our wildest dreams. He trusted us with one of His angels. That’s huge people. We never truly understood what that meant until about a year ago. I hope and pray that in everything we do God is glorified because of Him I’ll see my little girl again one day. 

I don’t know how people get through losing a child that don’t believe in Him.  I would have been so lost without Him.  I carry a Bible in my purse now.  Often I find myself searching for His promises to keep me on the straight and narrow.   I realize that if we don’t praise Him for all the small victories He gives us we’d go insane and we’ve been given so many small victories. 

Ashley and I were talking about the boys of Parker’s House the other night.  The pain that April and Russell know are so familiar to us.  The joy that Brad, Kellie, Mark, Kristin and soon Mike and Carolyn know is something so foreign to us but we’ve been put in a position where God has allowed us to know a small part of that joy.  These families have kept us alive.  They’ve kept us going.  When we are weak beyond words we find our strength in them.  They are amazing people.  I wish each of you had the opportunity to know them the way Ashley and I do because they’d change your lives too. 

I wish that I had all the answers and that I had that magic wand that would bring Parker, Avery, Seth, Joseph, Elli, Jack, Donny, Cecilia, Lilou and so many more back but I don’t.  I’ve Googled that damn thing on many sleepless nights and I swear it doesn’t exist because if it did Google would know where it was…..  Right???  The comfort I have is knowing that one day I’ll see my Parker again and when that day comes people you better move on out the way because I cannot and will not legally be held for my actions! 

As I’m sitting here typing this “I Can Only Imagine” just came on the radio.  It’s a song we played at P’s funeral.  Talk about crocidile tears.  God has a great sense of humor doesn’t He?  Someone once asked me as their child lay in the NICU dying what to do and I told them when you are too weak to stand kneel and pray like you’ve never prayed in your life.   There were and are many nights when we still find ourselves too weak to stand and it’s then we get on our knees and we pray. 

This wasn’t supposed to be a sermon but I want each of you to know that God walks this journey with us and it’s how we’ve been able to make each step.  They aren’t always graceful.  We are forever grateful for the foundation and for what it does for CDH families. 

Okay, seriously…. I’m listening to the radio and now “Believe” is on by Brooks and Dunn.  Another song we played at the funeral.  I’m getting ready to turn the radio off! 

I’ll never forget Parker.  I’ll never stop loving her.  Or missing her.  A huge part of my heart is gone and it’ll never be replaced.  I will die trying to help other families so that they don’t have to go through what we and so many other families have.  And I’ll continue to praise God and give Him all the glory.  Our lives aren’t perfect and every now and then when it’s just Him and me I still ask Him why. 

This post was quite the ramble.  In 10 days Avery will celebrate her 3rd birthday in Heaven.  Please pray for her family.  Lauren is her mom and is one of my best friends.  Too many babies are dying and it’s time we stood together to make a difference. 

Exodus 23:20 “See, I am sending an Angel before you to protect you on your journey and lead you safely to the place I have prepared for you.”