Simply A Farmer’s Wife

May 1, 2008, 8:39 am
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We are 7 days away from Parker’s birthday.  I am already getting anxious.  I’m trying to figure out how I will manage to make it through the next week.  

Please just say some prayers for us.  There are so many families who are going through what we are and we all need prayers. 

Her birthday is a happy day for us.  It’s the day she was born.  The day we finally saw our beautiful little girl.  The happiest day of our lives.  The day our family became complete.  Parker is so many things to us.  I wish that each of you had had the opportunity to meet her.  What a an astounding person she was.   I learned my courage and strength from her.  I learned how to love in a way I never knew possible from her.  I learned to forgive from her.  I learned to laugh from my gut from her.  I learned to smile without caring who was watching me.  I learned that it’s okay to cry in public.  I’ve learned so much from her. 

I hope that in those 20 hours I taught her something too. 

The days leading to her birthday are hard.  I miss her so much.  Damn you CDH.  Damn you for hurting so many families including my own. 

Yeah, I Leave Tomorrow.
April 23, 2008, 8:15 am
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So, I leave tomorrow to go see Lauren.  I am beyond excited!  I will get there around 6pm and cannot wait to see her.  She has our weekend planned and I so wish I was getting to stay longer.   We are going to have so much fun but I know that time is going to fly.  I have the absolute greatest graduation gift for her and cannot wait to give it to her.  Sheis going to freak out when she sees it!  I ordered it sometime ago and am surprised I’ve kept the secret this long.  I still have to finish packing.  Or start actually.  I am done with the laundry so all I need to do now is put the stuff in my suitcases.  I am going to try and be reasonable when I pack this time and not take unnecessary items.  I am going to get my hair done tonight.  I need desperately need a trim and my highlights need some touch ups.  I cannot wait for this day to be over.  My boss is supposed to be gone most of the day which will be nice!

Change of subject.  We went to visit Grandma Marion and my heart just broke.  She is very ill.  She was in great spirits though and even shared some stories with us.  I love her to death and am so glad that God brought her into my life.  Opal, my MIL, said she was doing so much better yesterday.  She is eating and getting around (with help).  I just hope that his family realize how limited time is with her and truly takes advantage of her still being here both in body and mind.  Please continue to keep her and his family in your prayers.

I better get some work done today since I’ll be gone the next two days!  I’ll definitely update while I’m away and I will take tons of pictures. 


Update, New Place To Go and Other Stuff.
April 17, 2008, 11:18 am
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Okay, so you can go to Carepages (ZacharyDavis) and visit Zachary’s page for an update.  Please keep this family in your prayers as they still need them.  If you have time please leave them a message of encouragement.   We love you Davis Family!

Okay, so many of you know Sheri Smith.  Wonderful and inspirational woman.  She gave birth to 3 CDH children.  All boys.  Jacob, Chance and Jaxtyn.  Her first two boys passed almost 17 years ago.  Sheri is a knowledgeable woman when it comes to CDH and extremely passionate.  She has searched for many years to find a way to honor her children and just recently she did.  She started a support group called, Stars of CDH.  It’s a Yahoo Group for any family, friend or medical professional who is seeking support for CDH.  There are many women already there and it’s a great place to just talk to people who get it.  I highly recommend this place as this women truly it a great person with no hidden agendas.  She just wants to help other families!  I am proud to call her my friend! 

We leave tomorrow after I get  off of work for Charleston.  I packed almost everything last night.  All the laundry is done except one load.  I will finish that tonight.  I have to pack our toiletries tomorrow morning and then we are set to go.  Ashley is dropping the girls (Pep and Ryleigh) off at the vet because they will keep them for us while we are gone.  And give them a much needed bath.  Somehow they managed to run off in the woods and get cow poop (shout out to Cristin) on them.  Ugh.   The weather is supposed to be gorgeous while we are there so we are looking forward to getting some color on our very pasty skin. 

Work is still good.  Busy but good.  I am trying to get everything caught up before I leave next week for Canada.  Otherwise my office will be a disaster when I return.  Oh who am I kidding it will be one anyway because my boss I swear is allergic to anything clean.   It drives me crazy because he messes up and I have to clean up.   Overall he’s a great boss.  He’s kind hearted, understanding and has a good personality.  I like him but like most men he annoys me at times. 

The weather here is gorgeous.  I hate having to work inside sometimes especially when the weather is like it is today.  I have no window either.  Only one office has a window and it belongs to the big man. 

Well, I better get some work done.  My dad is coming in town for the night so no working late tonight. 

Nothing Exciting.

Well, I am anxiously awaiting this weekend.  We leave Friday night after work to head to Charleston, SC.  This weekend is the Family Circle Cup and we are both so excited about going.  We need a break from here so we are counting down the days!  Neither of us have been to a professional tennis match so it will be a new experience.  I started playing tennis when I was 8 years old.  I have loved the sport since then and quit playing about 4 years ago due to not having anyone competitive to play with.  I hope to change that soon as I would love to start playing again with anyone who’s willing.

In 10 days I leave for Canada.  I cannot wait to see Lauren, Amanda, Aimee and Lauren.  I am so excited about going and gosh I need my girls!  Lauren has gone through some rough patches lately and has been kicking butt in school and we need a few drinks and some girl time.  I have never been to Canada before so I’m excited about going somewhere new. 

We attended a birthday party on Saturday and that was hard.  Megan was born two weeks before Parker so seeing her is somewhat difficult for us.  I think what got me most was when we sang Happy Birthday to her.  My heart sank as I looked over at Ashley and saw the expression on his face.  I so wish that I could give our little girl back to him.  We had a good time and we adore Megan’s parents.  They have been so good to us since Parker passed.  We are blessed to have them in our lives. 

Sunday I went to a viewing at the funeral home where Parker was.   That was so hard.  I cannot even begin to describe what I went through going there.  It was like I was paralyzed.  I knew that I needed to be strong for her as she had just lost her father.  I think I made a huge step in my own grief by helping her through her own.  I had a small anxiety attack but made it through somewhat unscathed. 

I found someone to do Parker’s cupcakes for her birthday.  We had ordered a cake through a wonderful bakery in Raleigh but she is moving at the end of the month so we found someone else last night.  She emailed me today and she is absolutely wonderful!  I am excited about what she will come up with and know that it will be as delicate as Parker is.  I cannot wait to share them with y’all.  Cupcakes is the new rave this year and I found this awesome blog that y’all should definitely check out Cupcakes Take The Cake.   You will be so glad you did!

Well, it’s time to cook dinner as Ashley will be home soon.  Please keep us and all CDH families in your prayers.  So many of us are celebrating birthday and anniversaries that the next three months are hard.  Prayer is powerful people! 

It Still Stings Two Years Later.

Today 2 years ago we were diagnosed with a rare birth defect known as Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia.  For those of you who know our story you know the impact this day had and continues to have on our lives. 

I remember sitting in the waiting room with Ashley.  My legs shaking badly because I knew something was wrong with our little girl.  It was a gut feeling.  We made our way into the room and for almost an hour and half they took measurment after measurement of Parker.   When we were told about her CDH I felt my world changing in the matter of seconds.  I knew we would walk out of that office and our lives would never be the same.  I cried for days wondering what would happen to our little girl.  A little girl we were told we would never have.  A miracle from our Lord. 

I don’t know how to confront this day each year except to honor our little girl and those babies who have been or will be diagnosed with Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia. 

We have met many wonderful people through this journey.  Too many to mention.  We are thankful and grateful to each of them for what they have given us.  This journey would not be possible without God and our family and friends.  Thank you to each of you! 

Well, now that I cannot see through my tears I’m going to close.  Please just say a prayer for us as this day is a hard one and means that her birthday is a month away.  Wow, how time flies.